The First Thanksgiving

My first Thanksgiving without her.

My first Thanksgiving with him.

 

My heart deeply grieves for the loss of my sister.

My heart is truly grateful for the presence of my fiancee.

I rejoice for the years that I had with her.

I rejoice for the years that I will spend with him.

I savor the sweet precious memories of her.

I am excited to make lasting memories with him.

There is a place in my heart that belongs only to her.

There is a place in my heart that only he completes.

I thank God that He chose me to be her sister.

I thank God that He chose me to be his wife.

Two vastly different emotions raging inside of

one person's heart at

one time because of

two amazing people who have forever changed my life.

Dresses for the Maids

This past Saturday my mommy, some of my bridesmaids, and I went to Bridesmaids, Inc in Homewood to try on bridesmaids dresses.  What a task!!  There are so many choices! It's overwhelming. 

I am not a demanding bride when it comes to dresses, hair, makeup, shoes, etc.  I really just want all my beautiful girls to feel comfortable and look even more gorgeous than they already are.  I originally suggested a conservative gown since the wedding is in a small town Baptist church.  By conservative, I was hoping for a dress with shoulder straps that doesn't cling to the body too snuggly.  Seriously, who wants to tug on a dress all day to keep it up and worry about curves, panty lines, etc. I don't think I realized what a challenge that would be.  Who would have guessed that all the gowns with shoulder straps would be so low cut?  For the love.  Unlike myself, the majority of my maids are blessed with great boobs which they should be proud of!  =) However, cleavage isn't really part of my definition of conservative!  I want people to be in awe over flowers, dresses, the church, and ME (lol, I am the bride!), not boobs and cleavage! I am sure this will disappoint some of the groomsmen though!  Ha, ha!

Needless to say, I changed my vision of a conservative dress and started looking at strapless gowns.  These were much better.  The gowns draped beautifully over the body and concealed all the cleavage.  Just what I wanted!!  I am so grateful for my girls.  They were certainly troopers trying on gown after gown. 

I believe we finally found the perfect one!!

This is my beautiful cousin, Lauren modeling the dress! 

(This is not the color by the way!  It will be Iris.)

I love this picture!!  Caroline is in the background looking excited!! =)

Allison is focused on pulling the dress snug because Lauren is so tiny!

Lauren looks as sassy and cute as can be!

Thank you to all my maids who came to play!!!

 Lauren, me, Allison, Caroline, Katie

Sacred Ground

When most girls want to talk with their sister, they have the convenience of calling her on the phone, meeting for lunch or dinner, or visiting one another at home.  Unfortunately, I no longer have this luxury.  When I need quality time with my sister, I have to go to one place.

What a harsh, cold, cruel reality.  This is my reality.

On Monday, I decided I needed some quality time with Amber.  I took my blanket, sat next to her grave, and shared my joys, fears, happiness, sadness, and tears.  I am sure people thought I was crazy as they drove past the cemetery and saw some poor girl sitting next to a grave crying for nearly an hour.  But, this is my reality.

I know without a doubt that Amber is in Heaven resting in the arms of our gracious Heavenly Father. 

I know without a doubt that I will see her again someday.

I know without a doubt that God's timing is always perfect.

I know without a doubt that God always knows what's best for each of us.

I know without a doubt God heals the brokenhearted. 

I know without a doubt that the pain of losing Amber is almost unbearable.

I know without a doubt that I miss her more everyday. 

I know without a doubt that there is peace and comfort at Amber's grave. 

I know without a doubt that her grave is a little piece of Heaven, precious sacred ground.

Sissy, I love you and miss you more than words could say!!
I can't wait to see you again someday!

Busy as a Bee!

Where does the time go?  Life has been so busy these past two weeks.  Don't get me wrong. I love to be busy because that means you are needed and people love you and want to be with you.  What a blessing!  But sometimes a girl needs some downtime so she can update her blog!!  I finally have some time tonight, so here we go!  I will try not to bore you with all the details but here is a lovely recap of my past two weeks.

I went to Christmas Village with my mommy and daddy. Yes, my dad is a really good man!!  Christmas Village is always a lot of fun and gets me in the Christmas spirit. This was my purchase for the event.  I love it and I think it is very encouraging!!

Later that night, I went to Disney on Ice with my Matron of Honor, her son (my future nephew), and prince charming's little sister.  We had so much fun!  I love Disney on Ice and I love spending time with my new family.  Of course, I couldn't leave without a souvenir.  Doesn't every 28 year old need an icee in a Mickey Mouse cup?

I went shopping for new jeans.  What a challenging task!  I really don't understand why all jeans these days look like someone has already worn them for 10 years, rolled around in the dirt while wearing them, ripped them, and then ran over them with a four-wheeler.  Seriously.  I had to search forever, but finally found normal cute jeans that fit! Yes, the have a little flair on the rear but they are so cute on that I couldn't resist.  I found them at Buckle in case you are wondering.

If you know me, you know that I can't buy jeans without buying a new pair of shoes.  Look how cute!!! I love, love, love them!!!

Additionally, I have spent much needed quality time with my husband-to-be (church, dinner dates, movies), shopped for Christmas decor that I really don't need =), had engagement pictures made, nursed my fierce cold back to health, and had multiple dinner dates with a few of my bridesmaids!  Whew, told you I have been busy!!

Now that you're probably thinking I shop a lot, I will promise you that I work a lot more!!!  I have been working hard saving lives at the pharmacy!!  Having a job is terribly time consuming. Don't ya think?! Too bad I need a paycheck or I wouldn't have time to fit a job into my social schedule!! HA!! 

Well, now you all must be bored to tears, but at least you know where I have been these past two weeks. Thanks for letting me document my days and thanks even more for reading!!

Yankee Candle Meltdown

The little maintenance light in my Honda has been blinking at me for several days reminding me that my oil needed to be changed.  So this morning I headed off to Tameron Honda.  It was there that I learned the light was blinking because my car needed a 75,000 mile maintenance checkup in addition to the oil change.  Lovely.  Needless to say, I ended up spending an extra chunk of money on my vehicle that I hadn't expected.

Despite the large amound of money I had just invested in my car, I was so close to the galleria that I couldn't resist driving over just to "look"!!  I really did need some new mascara.  For exercise (wink, wink!),  I walked the long way around the mall just to "look" in the store windows. 

Then it happened. 

I saw Yankee Candle Company.  In two seconds flat, the tears woudn't stop coming.  You see, my sister Amber absolutely loved Yankee candles. She had a gazillion and always had them burning in her room.  My family and I used to make special outings just so we could go by Yankee Candle to get more candles.  I couldn't believe it, but just seeing the store immediately made me have a meltdown. I pulled it together so I could go inside and get my mom and I each a candle to burn in her remembrance this holiday season. The sales lady at the store asked me who I was shopping for.  Bless her heart, the simple, kind question triggered a major meltdown. I could hardly speak through my stream of tears.  I told her about my sister and the sweet lady just held me in her arms and let me cry.  She began crying too and told me her dad had passed away in May.  She let me get all my tears out.  We talked about our shared faith in our Heavenly Father and how it feels to grieve the loss of a loved one.  I left the store, knowing that God places angels in our lives everyday to help us through tough times.  Today, the Yankee Candle lady was my angel for the day.

The candle I purchased.  Spiced Pumpkin!

Yummy for Thanksgiving!

I also bought these cute little silver charms with the letter "A" for Amber!